I want to let everyone know that I have not given up or forgotten about this blog. I have simply been very very busy and distracted. My car has been the source of most of my time lately, namely getting it fixed. It is still in progress, though it has now been smogged and I shall have my registration soon. Stress from that has been keeping me from blogging, and may for a while yet. Until that is finally done, I may only update periodically. But I shall try to keep you all informed. I mean, if you all still care enough.
Anyway, hope everyone is well.
Friday, March 2, 2012
Friday, February 10, 2012
Over Reactions
I haven't posted anything lately, because nothing really has been happening. Nothing to post if there's nothing to talk about.
So, Valentine's Day is coming up, and it can just go die. I don't even care.
Well, on a good note, this will be the first V-Day in over 10 years that I haven't been single. And my girlfriend is coming to CA to visit this weekend. So I am very very happy about that.
On a more sour note, I am upset about something that is so incredibly immature and stupid to be upset about that I am upset with myself for being upset. I am acting just like someone else who I really dislike, especially when they act exactly like this. But why am I so mad? Why does it just simply feel like a slap to the face? ARGH.
It is not the person's fault. It is only a game. A damn game. Yet... gods... I hate myself for being so upset with her. I hate it.
This is a rant post. Feel free to ignore it. I want to. I wish it never happened, but I feel a little better. A little.
So, Valentine's Day is coming up, and it can just go die. I don't even care.
Well, on a good note, this will be the first V-Day in over 10 years that I haven't been single. And my girlfriend is coming to CA to visit this weekend. So I am very very happy about that.
On a more sour note, I am upset about something that is so incredibly immature and stupid to be upset about that I am upset with myself for being upset. I am acting just like someone else who I really dislike, especially when they act exactly like this. But why am I so mad? Why does it just simply feel like a slap to the face? ARGH.
It is not the person's fault. It is only a game. A damn game. Yet... gods... I hate myself for being so upset with her. I hate it.
This is a rant post. Feel free to ignore it. I want to. I wish it never happened, but I feel a little better. A little.
Sunday, February 5, 2012
FTL of the Mind.
Tonight I have been watching the Supplement disc (Disc 2) for the David Fincher film 'The Social Network'. Not only is this one of my favorite films, I will now have to say that this may be my favorite special features disc as well.
Let me first say now that I love David Fincher films. The only David Fincher film I don't currently own is 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button'. David Fincher films make my mind rocket into intellectual wonderment.
Now, secondly, I will restate that 'The Social Network' is one of my favorite films ever. It makes me feel smart. It make me want to write, to think, to imagine. It makes me want to be better. Do things, be something. Live, think, breathe, move. A few things do this for me at the degree I'm talking about, but this was one of the first times (seeing the movie for the first time, I mean) that I noticed it so bluntly.
Part of the reason this movie does that is because it starts in a spot where the viewer is meant to try to keep up, causing the viewer to need to interact in a sense, in order to understand what they were just thrown into. A lot of films lately don't do this. A lot of films these days tend to simply let the viewer be lazy and sit back and drool on their tasty buttered popcorn and bladder-swelling cup of soda and watch the pretty lights and colors and jump-scares and be dazzled without any need to use a micron of fleshy grey matter. I will even admit I enjoy these kinds of films, though I also have to admit that I enjoy MOST films. Hence the reason I don't get into debates/discussions about movies very often and people have begun to use the colloquialism that I 'like everything'. This is mostly true.
More people need to think these days. We don't want to become the brainless and almost catatonic slugs that the humans became in the film 'Wall-E'. No indeed.
Friday, February 3, 2012
Issues not discussed.
So I was watching Glee. Am watching Glee. And it occurred to me, halfway through the episode I Kissed A Girl that this show covers a LOT of LGBTQ issues that nothing else I have watched ever does. (Okay, so it didn't just occur to me, rather the accumulation of many episodes of dealing with issues and the severity of the issues dealt with brought it to my rapt attention.)
In the previous episode, a member of the club is slightly outed in the hallway of the school. Well, its pretty much known they are gay/lesbian already, and so the rest of the school really doesn't care or mind. The problem is that this conversation leaks its way to politicians who use a campaign video to OUT this person completely publicly as a form of slander against their opponent. Not even caring about whether this young person has a choice in the matter. THIS IS HORRIBLE. In my opinion. I know its fictional, but the fact is that this could happen, and I find this possible situation abhorrent.
Although I must state that the writers of Glee, in my opinion, are amazing, for the very fact that they are dealing with these types of issues in such a public manner. This discussion is getting out through Main-Stream Television. This... in my opinion, once again, is amazing.
I know not everyone who reads this blog enjoys Glee. That's fine by me. If you don't like it, fine. That's not what I'm discussing (ie: raving) here. I'm talking about the issues.
I am now going to post a link:
http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/one-towns-war-on-gay-teens-20120202
This link is to a story, which I think may be a year old, but regardless, is still a terrible situation and issue in our country. As a transitioning Transgender Woman myself, I feel I am allowed the right to say thus. Bullying is horrid. I have been bullied in the past. Profusely. Its quite ironic that I've chosen the name I have, as one of the bullies in my past-- possibly the harshest -- was also named thus. I've had a lot of pain in the past, and I never talk about it. Mostly because I'd rather not remember. But it doesn't mean I have forgotten.
No one deserves to be treated any less than a human being. No one.
In the previous episode, a member of the club is slightly outed in the hallway of the school. Well, its pretty much known they are gay/lesbian already, and so the rest of the school really doesn't care or mind. The problem is that this conversation leaks its way to politicians who use a campaign video to OUT this person completely publicly as a form of slander against their opponent. Not even caring about whether this young person has a choice in the matter. THIS IS HORRIBLE. In my opinion. I know its fictional, but the fact is that this could happen, and I find this possible situation abhorrent.
Although I must state that the writers of Glee, in my opinion, are amazing, for the very fact that they are dealing with these types of issues in such a public manner. This discussion is getting out through Main-Stream Television. This... in my opinion, once again, is amazing.
I know not everyone who reads this blog enjoys Glee. That's fine by me. If you don't like it, fine. That's not what I'm discussing (ie: raving) here. I'm talking about the issues.
I am now going to post a link:
http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/one-towns-war-on-gay-teens-20120202
This link is to a story, which I think may be a year old, but regardless, is still a terrible situation and issue in our country. As a transitioning Transgender Woman myself, I feel I am allowed the right to say thus. Bullying is horrid. I have been bullied in the past. Profusely. Its quite ironic that I've chosen the name I have, as one of the bullies in my past-- possibly the harshest -- was also named thus. I've had a lot of pain in the past, and I never talk about it. Mostly because I'd rather not remember. But it doesn't mean I have forgotten.
No one deserves to be treated any less than a human being. No one.
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Music. Emotion. Taste.
Music. Someone's choice in music is an interesting and ever-fickle quandary. It is a bias based on emotional response to the sounds, notes, and voices, their current emotional state, as well as the ever-changing pattern of emotional state they go through day after day. At least, that's how I see it. Some days I love certain bands, some days I couldn't stand to listen to them. That doesn't mean I don't like them anymore, merely that my taste in music is ever-evolving.
Lately, I have been listening to wide range of new music, thanks to Spotify. Bands such as Trespassers William, Azure Ray, The Veils, The Stills, The Walkmen, Liam Finn, Susie Suh, Eisley, Rilo Kiley and Flunk. These bands aren't all the same sound, but they are somewhat new and different to my tastes. Of course, my tastes have never really stayed the same. I've gone through Motown stages, Rock stages, Punk stages, Heavy Metal, slow calming Instrumental stages, Techno, even a stage where I listened to hip-hop because it was the only station.
Music, to me, has always been important, but for the last couple of years, I haven't been doing a lot of listening. Mainly, since my iPod broke. The only reason I've been listening a lot more lately is because I finally got some nice headphones (over the ear ones, that fit over my gauges) that lets me hear music as it was truly meant to be heard. Music has suddenly exploded back into my life, and I'm trying to find what I like again.
I love it.
Hm. There seems to be no real point to this post. I guess if you read this far, congrats. This is how I think about things. :)
Lately, I have been listening to wide range of new music, thanks to Spotify. Bands such as Trespassers William, Azure Ray, The Veils, The Stills, The Walkmen, Liam Finn, Susie Suh, Eisley, Rilo Kiley and Flunk. These bands aren't all the same sound, but they are somewhat new and different to my tastes. Of course, my tastes have never really stayed the same. I've gone through Motown stages, Rock stages, Punk stages, Heavy Metal, slow calming Instrumental stages, Techno, even a stage where I listened to hip-hop because it was the only station.
Music, to me, has always been important, but for the last couple of years, I haven't been doing a lot of listening. Mainly, since my iPod broke. The only reason I've been listening a lot more lately is because I finally got some nice headphones (over the ear ones, that fit over my gauges) that lets me hear music as it was truly meant to be heard. Music has suddenly exploded back into my life, and I'm trying to find what I like again.
I love it.
Hm. There seems to be no real point to this post. I guess if you read this far, congrats. This is how I think about things. :)
In The Beginning...
I was reading a book. The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, to be precise. I'm nearly halfway through, and a certain section has prompted undesirable thoughts. Well, not thoughts. Memories. Memories of Elementary/Middle/High School, things I never think about. Things I don't like to think about.
Larsson's writing is addictive. He has drawn me in, and the way he has written has provoked emotional responses within my unconscious without me realizing it. This has triggered memories to come up.
I'll be honest, I have a somewhat terrible memory. I barely remember anything concrete about my childhood. Mostly flashes, and what I do remember I tend to shy away from. So thus, this sudden influx of happily un-thought-about memories is rather.... disconcerting. For one, I'm suddenly a bit happy that I can remember this stuff. But secondly, I don't like remembering parts of my childhood. It wasn't a terrible childhood. I just had a lot of uncomfortable and unhappy memories mixed in with all the happy ones.
Okay. For a first post, this is rather sufficient.
Till next time.
Larsson's writing is addictive. He has drawn me in, and the way he has written has provoked emotional responses within my unconscious without me realizing it. This has triggered memories to come up.
I'll be honest, I have a somewhat terrible memory. I barely remember anything concrete about my childhood. Mostly flashes, and what I do remember I tend to shy away from. So thus, this sudden influx of happily un-thought-about memories is rather.... disconcerting. For one, I'm suddenly a bit happy that I can remember this stuff. But secondly, I don't like remembering parts of my childhood. It wasn't a terrible childhood. I just had a lot of uncomfortable and unhappy memories mixed in with all the happy ones.
Okay. For a first post, this is rather sufficient.
Till next time.
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